Fall in the Air

Last week we had temperatures reaching the 90's. With the arrival of Earl on the East coast (some 700 miles away from us in Indianapolis) we have had quite the change in weather. The air is cool, the breeze pleasant and the temperatures closer to the 50's (current temp is 55).
I love it!
This is my favorite kind of weather.
The evening breeze is wonderful. Almost too cold. Just the way I like it. This morning as I took the dogs out, I noticed I could see my breath. Now if we would get a first frost, my allergies would go away.
In Indiana, we are Blessed with the most beautiful watercolors in the heart of Fall. The vivid colors are incredible.
The cool crisp air is bringing the change of colors in our autumn leaves a bit early. The yellows are beginning, soon to be followed by reds, purples and browns.
This afternoon my youngest will be in town and Sergio, Annie & I will try to get to the RibFest. It looks like it is going to be a perfect day for it.

The Paths We Choose

I am not sure if this is the right title for this blog this evening...

My thoughts are wrapped around how people choose to live.

By choice.

I daily drive through a few lower income neighborhoods. I also drive by some pricey downtown condominiums.

As I drive by the lower income neighborhoods, I am amaze by several things.
I notice that this is a diverse neighborhood. There are mostly Caucasians, African Americans, and Hispanic families that live here. There are churches of many denominations.
I see graffiti and I have seen a drug deal "go down".
I see children playing, neighbors chatting, and people enjoying life. I also see parents waiting with children to board school buses and I see parents waiting for them to get off buses. When driving through the weekends I see baseball games, with huge turn outs.
I see drunks trying to walk a straight path, homeless people passing by, and occasionally I see a tired young prostitute walking in the early hours.
Most of these people appear to be hard working people. Some appear to be freeloaders.
Most of these homes are well kept. Flowers, gardens, even several hang those Tomato Topsy Turvies things with lush tomato plants hanging out. Some are not so well kept with high grass, broken glass and junk in the yard. Many have furniture sitting on the front porches.
With Halloween around the corner (okay... I agree, we still have 8 weeks, but if it is in the stores...) I am already seeing the "artwork" begin. Massive spider webs, and those giant air filled characters, pumpkins and such. This will continue throughout all the holidays, with the Mother of them all (Or should I say Father) Christmas with elaborate light displays that stay on all night. I also notice that although money may be tight, I see a ton of satellite dishes, as well as other items that are not inexpensive. I am curious as to why people would chose to spend their hard earned dollars on the like.
These people for the most part enjoy the lives that God has given them. They make the best of them and do what they gotta do. I hear and see people singing, playing guitars and I hear laughter.

The upper class condominium neighborhoods?
I see runners and joggers. I see dog walkers. I see expensive clothing and expensive gadgets. I see posh furniture gleaming out the windows. I see expense cars. I see restaurants.
I see homeless wander through. I see some gang activity occasionally. I hear a loud ghetto blaster pouring out of a passing car.
That's about it.

I don't see children. I don't see neighbors chatting. I don't see holiday greetings. I don't hear laughter.

I wonder if the wealthy get too caught up in the high society world and forget to sit back and enjoy life?

Do you need to be a little humbled to appreciate life and make it the best you can?

I ponder this. I do believe we choose the lives we live to a point. Situations happen that can turn a world upside down in a nano second. I do believe you need to accept and make the best rather than complain and whine. I do believe it can be easy to get to caught up when one is privilege and forgets to relax and enjoy.

Of course I am not talking about everyone. We all have a story. We all live a life and see things differently.

But I do wonder. What if we took a good look at what we have and what we don't. Maybe remembering to be thankful for what we do, and to remember to LIVE isn't such a bad idea.

Never Enough

I am very hard on myself, and often feel that I am not enough.


Not smart enough;

Not strong enough;

Not happy enough;

Not pretty enough;

Not healthy enough;

Not content enough;

Not thankful enough;

Not grounded enough;

Not careful enough;

Not willful enough;

Not competent enough;

Not thankful enough;

And

Not good enough.


Self-esteem issues. I know. I am working on them. Sometimes I go about feeling my best is enough. But sometimes, often, I don't.


I pray about it. I seek counsel. I write and I have coping skills to help.


Sometimes, it isn't enough.


The overwhelming feeling can creep up building slowly, and sometimes just kick me in the behind so fast I certainly didn't see it coming.


It has a grasp on me some days. A strong grasp. The fight within is wearing me down.


I just want to go back to bed.


I know, I know, this will pass. I am good enough really. I have to remember I am like the little engine that thought he could. Just keep working it till I can convince myself .


Maybe one day I will feel it...

my affair w/ the Cap'n

Yes, it's true. I am in love. This guy has had my heart for about 40 years. He knows a way to my heart is my.... stomach.

If only his cereal didn't leave the roof of my mouth so raw!