That's Not ME!!!

Hubby & I

Have you ever got ready to go somewhere... and felt pretty good about your hair, make up, and clothes? Felt you are looking good... healthy.. grateful for the few shedded pounds, feeling comfortable.  But then, later, catch your reflection, or see a photo and think... who is that? I know I left the house looking better than that!

Yesterday, I had to attend a wake service thingy, for my Brother-In-Law. I chose a brown dress that makes me feel pretty.  Both my Daughter and Father In Law, commented on how I looked, that I looked thinner & pretty. Made me feel very good.

We got home made a quick change & took off for a college football game and tailgating fun.

I still felt good about looking how I felt. I thought my hair was behaving (not doing that stupid cowlick thing I catch in most photos) and was happy that my jeans were actually needing a belt.

Things aren't always the way they seem.  Rather than a person with an eating disease that thinks they look worse than reality, sometimes things are flipped & you don't look as good as you thought.

My friend Carol took this photo...obviously, not a good profile of me. My waist is not that wide... I'm still a size six, but I hope that it's just the damn chair making me look like that... And the bus driver arms... please someone tell me how to rid myself of these cruel oldie reminders..

I use to embrace aging. I absolutely loved the ages 35-45.  I had a rocking little body that I finally accepted. My hair was healthy, and my skin was amazing. Something started changing once I past 45 and let me tell you... it's been down~hilling ever couple of months.

Weight gain... whatever. My hair lost it's shine & has odd gray curly hairs that stick out like floral sprays. I get these "age spots" all over my body, as well as stray "eyebrows" that manage to make their way in the worst places... not to mention the occasional skin tag and sebaceous cysts. My vision has weakened and I can't always see well enough to get make up on without looking like a clown (hence why I rarely wear it).
I am MENOPAUSAL... Oh now this is quite a joyous journey. Mom had a Hysterectomy at 35 so she skipped this little phase of womanhood.  My Sis, just told me her Doctor told her it can sometimes last 10 years. WTH? Seriously?  Not what I needed to hear! I'm always hot... I get teary EASILY... I have to admit, I get annoyed and yes, occasionally bitchy.  (I'm sorry to those in my path).

I wanna be that woman I know I can be & look.  The one I see myself... in my mind... not in the mirror!

I wish Calgon could really take me away in a wonderful bath like the old commercials.  I need my "Peace in the Valley".
sigh