Back In The Saddle...again

San Antonio Bi-Centennial Trail Ride 1976

I'm moving forward. 
Life certainly throws some interesting things at us and it isn't always easy to make the right choices.  The thing is you have to make choices and accept the consequences.  In hindsight, would we make the same choice had we known the outcome?  Who knows. 
But we have to trust in ourselves that we are doing the best we can and for me... with a little help from my friends (and family), and a lot of help from God, I am moving forward.

One year ago today, I could not imagine what was to come in the next several months. I feel a bit like a hurricane hit and I am cleaning up the after mass.  You can't expect it to come together quickly.  I have learned that all that praying for patience (my whole life) would come in handy one day.

Several times I have come to my Blog, ready to write... to vent... to heal.  But as the words flowed off the keyboard, I couldn't finish a post.  They are like broken pieces waiting to be fixed. So much to say and yet so much not to share. For the first time in a long time I felt I had to figure this out by myself.  You might say, I am different now.  I would like to say it's a good thing.  But it is also a little sad.

The above picture is a snippet of a very large photograph  taken July 4th 1976.  During one of my treasured summers in Texas, my Grandparents took me along with them on a Bi-centennial Trail Ride.  It took us 3 days to ride horseback from Austin to San Antonio. It was amazing.  If you look close, Grandma circled our faces in this photo, just left of the horse that moved his head.

Just prior to this trip, I was in an accident on my Grandmothers horse, Fancy.  I saddled her up myself.  My Grandparents always told me to knee her chest so she would exhale before strapping the breast strap.  I felt like it was cruel... I wasn't going to"kick" her with my knee.  I felt she was just fine. She wasn't.  30 minutes into my ride, she wanted to go back to the stables.  She was "done" entertaining me.  That's when I realized what my Grandparent was talking about.  She snorted a bit, causing the saddle to loosen.  She started jumping around rearing up and bucking.  The saddle started to slip and some how, my foot tangled between her side and the saddle.  I was dragged a bit, terrified to say the least.  I was so sure she would crush me. My Grandfather caught up with us and calmed her.  I was untangled and pulled to safety.  Once my scrapes were tended and we saw no serious damage.  I was thrown back on her.  Oh My God! The last thing I wanted was to ride!  But, like the wonderful Grands they were, they kept me back on her until my fear subsided and I was back in control.  (Took frickin' forever, but I finally came around... Fancy too, she was pissed!).

Life is that way.
no matter what the fear, the pain, the obstacle... we must find a way to conquer it and move forward.

Much has transpired over the past few months. I have much to share. Hopefully, I will get my comfort back as I jump back onto this saddle.

Stumbling

I stumbled a bit this week. 
A couple of things tripped me up.
BUT... It's all good.
There was a time not so long ago, I could not handle stumbling.  Be it small and personal or something major upsetting me enough to take quite a tumble.

Not so long ago, I would get panicky... frustrated... or overwhelmed.

I would struggle with the stumbling and need help back up.

Things have changed for me.
I still stumble...
Things happen that, well, darn it, wasn't a part of the plan I HAD. 

Something has changed in me.  Something for the better.  Now, I can look past the tumbles and trip ups.

Even if I still get scraps and bruises.
I know I will be okay.

I think I have learned to take things with a little salt...
I have learned that maybe, just maybe, I needed that little trip...

You see, I have learned to make that stumble a part of the plan. Turn it into.. I meant that... kind of like, when you start to stumble and turn it into a goofy dance. 
That's where I am today.

The Charlie Schulz Philosophy

You may be familiar with this. I have read it before and recently received it in an email. It is one of those, hmmm makes you think kind of things. I do not know where it originates from but felt it was Blog worthy.

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schulz, the creator of the 'Peanuts' comic strip.

You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just ponder it.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.
4 Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday.
These are no second-rate achievers.
They are the best in their fields.
But the applause dies.
Awards tarnish..
Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.
Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one :

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier?
The lesson :

The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the
most credentials, the most money...or the most awards.
They simply are the ones who care the most.

''Be Yourself. Everyone Else Is Taken!"

Happy Birthday Pumpkin

 

 My Emily turned 22 yesterday.
To you young Mom's
or Mom's to be, I give you this advice.


♥hold on tight to your little girls...
♥Read to them, every night while you can...
♥play with them every chance you get...
♥be silly with them a lot..
♥let them "help" you cook,
no matter how messy it gets...
♥let them fix your hair, even if it hurts...
♥sing with them, even the weird hip hop or tiny bop...
♥let them "help" with their little siblings,
so what if the diaper isn't put on right,
it's about learning and trust...
♥get to know their friends...
♥ get to know their teachers...
♥take your turn being a Room Mom...
♥be the Brownie, Girl Scout or youth church leader...
♥go to every game, practice, competition
(yes even if it means sitting for 4 hours to watch them perform for 3 minutes)...
♥teach them chores and expect them to do them...
♥make boundaries because you love them...
♥know when to be the mean Mom...
♥follow through...
♥don't be judgmental...
♥let her develop her own style, not the one you want them to have...
♥respect her, cherish her, and love her.

The reward of seeing her develop into a fine woman will amaze you.
Mine do me.

It All Amounts To ...Not Much

I just completed two long, hot, tiring days of an Estate Sale. I am talking 90+ degrees baking sun, with my Uncle, a couple of Cousins, Husband, and a couple of friends. My Husband & Cousin's Husband joined us day two, so day one, I was the "most able-body", (My Uncle & friend, both had multiple heart surgeries, knee surgeries, as well as other health issues, oh, and they are up there in the sixties & seventies also). One Cousin is a scrappy, tiny, seventy-six year woman who certainly can pull her weight... but she weighs maybe 90? The other Cousin is 13 years younger than I, but ridden with health issues, and unable to lift things). So, I got a work out. Very thankful day two Sergio & Bradley's muscles were at hand!

To take a couple's household of 50th years, and reduce it to an "Estate Sale", is heart wrenching. Sure, several items were already "inherited" out and some stuff was thrown away, but think about the contents of your home.... then imagine it lining up your drive way and garage being sold pennies for the dollar.

My Aunt & Uncle hoarded alot of stuff. They recorded EVERYTHING and had these records on hand, just in case ever needed. My Aunt kept every card, letter and notes. Her postie notes from her office job, graduation & wedding announcements, even from friends granddaughters and sons. My Uncle had paperwork, notes and receipts for just about everything in the home and then some. We found their dog Sam's little sweaters and leases ( Sam died about thirty years ago when they lived in another state).

My Aunt & Uncled bought the higher quality stuff, paid big bucks, but it lasted forever. To sell a $1000 treadmill for $30, a $2000 bedroom suite for $200, and a $300 painting for $20 is crazy, but what else can you do? The economy is bad, ebay & Craigslist is time consuming and no guarantees (let along we had hundreds of items). We were forced to take what we could so that money could go toward my Aunts care, as well as empty the home so it could get on the market. Some of the things are truly treasures and difficult to see go for next to nothing. Some didn't find new homes. Goodwill will hopefully find homes for these items. Some items made their way to our trunks as we just could not throw away. I couldn't watch this hair dryer go to the trash. It was a little beauty I had to keep. My Bestie, Sheri used these forever. I am hoping she will give it a good home. I worked hard at getting the best prices for their things. I am grateful that my Cousins, the Daughters, were not here to watch this transpire. It was heart breaking enough for us, I can only imagine watching people take the pieces of my parents life little by little.

On a happier note, It was lovely to see, particularly young families, excited about getting the deals. To see people happy about their finds. I would like to think that this stuff will continue to get good use.

The house has been updated, and is just about ready to go on the market. It's tough. The whole process has been difficult. It is an eye opener. Makes me want to "be prepared". I don't want my daughters to be in a position to have to go through all of this ordeal.

It is really an strange feeling. To see that a lifetime of a person's "stuff" amounts to not much at all in the end. I guess, the important lesson here was, enjoy what you have and make the best of it. Get rid of what you don't need or use. Pass things on to your loved ones while you still have the chance... or they just might end up in the wrong hand.