What do you do when remembering to breathe is not enough?
When you feel so overwhelmed and so incapable.
I try so hard to keep things in prospective. I try to keep positive. I have so very much to be thankful for. Such a wonderful husband and dear sweet daughters.
Every time I am back up and happy, something or someone cruelly punches me in the gut or knocks me down. How do I keep that from sucking me into a dark place?
I was doing okay, trucking along, when suddenly I was blindsided by the Boogey Man. An evil crusher that takes my self esteem and destroys it.
Last night, I was so overwhelmed. I tried so hard to stop the tears from sliding down my checks. My supervisor, is sweet and reminded me I could take a 10 minute break if I needed. I thanked her, but told her my quota is too low and I could not afford the break. I finally pulled it together after Sergio's texts made me smile (God, how I love this man!).
Why can't I stay out of this funk?
I have so much I need to be doing.
I must find a job that gives me the hours and pay that will adequately subsidize our income.
I must clean this home before Emily and her friends arrive Friday.
I must get photos organized and start Annie's senior slide show.
I must get correspondence and bills together and sent out.
And I must get ready for my visit with Betsy. Ahh Betsy. Hopefully, she can shed some light on my dilemma and bring me to a happy or at least peaceful place.
Sorry to be doom and gloom. Just one of those weeks...