And So it Goes...

2012

It has been an eventful year for many. Especially me.

2012 has been rather life changing for me.
 

I lost my Mom,

 

became my Dad's care-giver.

 

I turned 50.

 

Almost lost my marriage, but instead strengthened it.

 

Had one Daughter not only graduate from college, but land her dream job.

 

While the other got the chance of a lifetime, studying abroad and catching dreams.

 Strengthened some friendships and family ties as well.

We have had some health scares. And we have had financial hic-cups.
The weather has been strange, down right crazy.
The World's current events have been terrifying with our own USA crime unbelievable.
The lack of respect and responsibility has been embarrassing.

 

Made some pretty major decisions. And started seeing things differently.

Through all this year, one thing is certain.  I have become a much stronger woman.  I have found my voice.  I think I have come to understand that regardless to what happens in my life, I have the power to stand... to take what God has put before me and to figure it out. 
I use to think that everything that happened was a part of God's plan... I don't so much anymore.  I do believe that He has planned my life and given me the opportunity to live life to its fullest. However... I do not find Him responsible for the evil and bad things that happen in our lives.  He helps us through the storms, and helps us from sinking.  He puts things in our paths to help us find the solid ground or even sometimes a floatation to get us to that solid ground. 
This I know.  God Loves Me.
As I pray I am doing what I should and it is good enough.
I have come to realize...I am enough.

I have caught my breath and I am ready for what 2013 has in store.  There are so many exciting things looming around the corner. I am thrilled to take on this year.  I am sure there will continue to be mountains to climb and valleys to cross, but, I'm good.
I got this.

 

exhale

The soothing satisfaction of being able to exhale. 
I was uptight, nervous, and short of breath. As Christmas was looming I was fretting.  Would this Holiday be as disastrous as Thanksgiving?  Was I going to be a tearful emotional mess again? Or was I going to be okay this Holiday?


With prayer, I woke with a gentle warmth in my heart and a strength in my soul. I was okay with this Holiday.

The day flowed with funny mishaps but no pain.

I burnt the ham... I burnt the corn.... I burnt the rolls. Seriously? Who does that?  I NEVER burn things. But my sweet Family laughed with me and ate it.

Dad had a spike in his blood sugar.  A very high spike... But with insulin we got him back to normal.



jan annie sheri 12.25.12

Later in the evening Annie & I talked Sheri into going to a movie. Parental Guidance. Sweet little funny movie.  I spilled two not just one over sized Diet Cokes on myself at two different times.  Before giving myself a hard time over this... I will say that three other folks in the theater did also so I totally blame the flimsy over sized cups not the user. Hanging with Annie & Sheri was such a wonderful thing.  We laughed. A lot.  Annie's snort laugh.  Sheri's squeal with tears. And my gasping guffaw.

The weather held back. Giving us a warm day perfect for transporting Dad to my house. Waiting to bring us the beautiful snow the next morning. We got a beautiful display of white blanket, along with wicked winds.  The snow photograph at the top of the post, is of a snow overhang from our roof.  So pretty.

My Mom was all around me this Christmas. 


sis mom me...a few years back

It was not sad.  It was not manic. It was her sweetness. Her softer side.  The fun... the love. 

I was able to enjoy this Christmas.. and that is huge.

I miss my Mom.  I miss the good times, not the manic. 

But, it's all good.  I'm able to breathe, I'm able to exhale.

Taking a Breath

The past few weeks are swirling by. I never seem to find the time to sit down and write anymore. I run 24/7 and when I do stop, my head crashes into the pillow and I sleep.
I have had some wonderful breaks, time spent with the Hubby, my Girls, and my Dear Besties. But as for reading and writing time... I have not been able to make that happen.

 Having a week off from work will free up some 50 hours. I requested 3 books from the library. That will give me some serenity. I have a few appointments to take my Dad and some paperwork, phone work and leg work with Dad's business. That will keep me busy. My Hubby needs me to assist in a few things. Check.. got that covered.  My youngest daughter will be home from College for Thanksgiving Break as of Wednesday.. {yay Baby Girl time!} I look forward to catching up with her as she has been such a busy little Bee. Thanksgiving is here! Oh boy... I will have 6 - 16 for dinner Thursday. While frustrating to not have an exact count, such is family plans. I am just Blessed to keep busy as this is the first holiday since Mom's death.  Not only do I need to keep steady for myself but I want Dad to be okay through it.  Christmas shopping will start as well as Birthday shopping for my oldest {can she really be turning 24?}. I am finally getting well from a strange skin and eye infection.  Another week and I may be able to wear contacts and makeup for the first time in ...well, too long.  I'm making an appointment for my Pommie, Dakota to get a haircut as well as I have made an appointment for myself to rid myself of my long straight graying hair, trading in this Church Lady look for something with a little kick and style.  I am needing a little pick me up and a fresh look will help.  I also have a little big something else up my sleeve that I am not ready to spill out, it's a good thing, but a private thing.  Nonetheless... keeping me very very busy as well.

I have taken some steps back from social media lately.  It gets so overwhelmingly full of negativity. I "aint got no time for that".  Nor the energy. Also, with Deer Season in full swing here in Indy... this Bambi loving Gal really does not want to see everyone's kill shots, gutting shots, and glory shots.
No thank you...

Another sad note... I haven't had as much time for reading my favorite blogs.  Yesterday, I stole a few morning moments with a cup of Joe, and dived into blog reading.  TWO of my favorite reads have gone private!  :(  These two extraordinary Gals have such a knack for making me smile and enjoy the reads.  I must email them asap to get invited into the groups.  They are two of my favorites and I so hope to get back in as I have been following for far too many years to go cold turkey without my doses of laughter with them.

I want to write some more letters!  I started this "hobby" recently and the joy of receiving them back is absolutely delicious!  Also brings me such a smile thinking of friends receiving a letter the old fashion way, from me.

I spent a wonderful weekend with my two best friends. I want to write a post on it, but will leave you with this picture for now.  I must say, it was just what the Doctor ordered for me.  It was simply Divine!

Deb, Jan, Sher Besties 2012
 

Howdy Doody

I know I have been MIA for awhile.  I've had much to say, but need to be reserved.  I'm being censored so to speak, and to avoid being misunderstood or speaking of things before really thinking about it (hence my post a while back), I have been staying back in the shadows a bit.  Also, on a brighter note I have been wonderfully busy.

Work is still fabulous, although stressful.  I am so crazy about "my girls".  I'm a proud Momma of the young women they are and so grateful to be a small part of their lives.  They are patient with me as I continue to break the communication barrier.  My sign language has improved greatly, however my ASL stinks... Especially if you are asking my professor who is so frustrated with me and my old "English" habits.  I refuse to be a quitter and continue on (even through tears occasionally). I do think that I am learning everyday.  I just wish I could follow better and not miss so much of the conversations.  It is a struggle.  I do love my Boss! I could not ask for a more caring and wonderful person to work for.  She reminds me much of my friend Jill.  When I worked for Jill, she never made me feel inferior. I feel more of a team player than a worker bee.  My Boss is also very patient with my communication struggles and is very encouraging and supportive. I do believe that she is pleased with me and the job I am doing.  I hope to be working with her for years to come.  As the school year is wrapping up, the residential students are finishing up yet another year of education.  Making prom dates, practicing for the school play, busy with track and softball, and a few of my girls are preparing for graduation and what is to come.  I wrote a letter of recommendation for one of my girls as she anticipating getting accepted to RIT (Rochester Institute of Technology).  She is amazing and I am anxious to see her succeed. 
Speaking of ANXIOUS... soon we will know what Dorm we will be assigned for the coming Fall.  I am so hoping to remain with the High School Girls.  It will be a hard adjustment to have a new assignment.  Also I am in hopes that I will continue to work with the Co-Worker I currently have.  She is an incredible young woman that I greatly admire and have so enjoyed sharing the Dorm with.  We are a great team, and after some of the experiences we have had, I think we both feel pretty good together and hope to continue a team.

I am trying to secure a job for summer employment.  Trying to find a job for 8 weeks is not easy.  Our School schedule has changed, therefore, while many schools are on a different schedule, summer Nanny jobs are requiring employment through mid August, and I go back to ISD August 1st.  Being off sounds lovely but the fear of not getting those summer paychecks are too scary!

Hubby took Emily and Annie to Las Vegas this weekend.  He has business there this week and the girls are joining him for the weekend.  I considered going as well. However, I have been so Blessed to take so many trips with the girls and poor Hubby has not.  So, this was a wonderful opportunity for him to take them and enjoy a fast weekend with much to do.  They left yesterday.  Ms Emily hasn't been on a plane in about 6 years and was a tad nervous (it was Friday the 13th too).  Annie is more traveled, preparing to leave this summer for London.  Annie sent me this picture from the plane.

Splendid, isn't it?
It was a long flight with a layover in Phoenix.  They got there last night before 10pm, but with the time change, they gained 3 hours.     They got checked in at Bally's, grabbed dinner, and played some slots and looked around.  Today Hubby took them shopping.  Sounds like they all did well.  Emily found a dress, Annie shoes, and Hubby jeans.  I know they are having a blast. (Dad will spoil them and they so deserve to be spoiled alittle :)
Hubby just sent this to me.

Babies at Ceasars

Hoping they make at least one show while there.  So much to see in a short time.  Emily said its chilly so they haven't enjoyed the pool. Hopefully it will warm up!

Well, I hate to admit it... but I am enjoying the house to myself.  I have Pandora playing my golden oldies.  I have a fire in the fireplace. I'm cleaning, de-cluttering, purging, and catching up on Blog World.  Also pinning on Pinterest and nervous after reading a report on a favorite Blog of Pinterest in Jeopardy (copy write laws).. Please don't take my Pinterest away... People I have more than 50 boards and over 6,000 pins.  Yes, I have a bit of an obsession with it.  It's that great.  I hope to finish a couple of Pinterest projects this week while Hubby is away.  I'm also watching that goofy television programs Hubby would never watch with me.  Eating eggs for dinner, Capt'n Crunch for lunch and drinking a little wine too.  It's a mini vacation even though I am working too!

Which reminds me... I need to get some taxes done so I better go for now.

Ha Ha Emily

Do you remember a few years ago when so many people not only jumped on board to proudly display their "Support for our Troops" yellow magnetic Ribbons on vehicles... but started doing an overload of support this or that...  Soon it seemed those dang ribbons were EVERYWHERE and in every color!

Now, please don't get me wrong.  I am all about Free Speech and encourage others to be passionate about their causes. 
Once my Besties and I went on a Girlfriends Weekend and were slightly overwhelmed by the over-abundance of Ribbon Power.  We were very politically incorrect at making it a humorous game to pass the time on the highway.
You still see ribbons here and there, but the "craze" has died down a bit.

Enter the new "Look at my statement on my car" fad.

I am sure you have seen them....  Look, this family has six kids.  Oh and how cute... I know what they like by the props they have.
It gets a bit overly TMI, don't you think?
And as my daughter says.... what a stupid way to let pervs know about the fact you have kids , pets, and what you do.  It's like an invitation to your vulnerability.

My daughter hates these, as much as I hated the ribbon power.

So, being mischievous, as I am.... I found some to tag her car. 
Emily loves her cat. Her fat cat.  So, we knew we had to include Izzy.
Sunday she was over for dinner and I had my opportunity to be sneaky.

So freakin' cute!  So funny!  I text her Sis to let her know I finally got them on her car (I have had them since Christmas!)  I keep laughing thinking about tagging her and hope that plenty of time past before she will discover it.

Yesterday, I get a call from her (she is completely cracking up) demanding to know when I did this.  I deny and act like I have no idea what she is talking about.  She discovered while returning to her car after work.. I can't lie... she has so caught me!  We have a good laugh. she has removed them.
Later, she texted me this photo to show they didn't go to waste.. They now reside on her laptop :)

Once Again...Crazy Indiana Weather

March always has surprises for us Hoosiers.  I can remember wearing shorts in March... and I remember wearing coats in March.  We always have our rain boots ready for March, and sometimes we get to pull out sandals.
You just never know in Indy.

Yesterday was my daughters first "evening" of Spring Break.  It also is the first Spring Break whereas my Girls are not running off to some warmer climate such as Florida or Texas to "celebrate SB".  College Spring Break Style... But not to be for them this year. While many of their buddies loaded up for some fun in the sun, my girls will be home in Indiana.  Annie will be working in Muncie, as her Summer Abroad Program to London nears.  Emily is also working, as a Student Teacher here in Indianapolis, with her 1st graders that will not have Spring Break for a few more weeks.

Back to the weather...
Yesterday was one of those CRAZY  WTH? kind of weather days.  The sun didn't shine much and when it did peek out it was eerie.  We had wild thunder storms, strong winds and big booty hail.  And the tornadoes ripped across the Southern part of our state as well as Kentucky, Ohio and Illinois.

Henryville IN 3.2.12

The photos circulating are amazing.  I can't even imagine what it would be like to capture such strength on film. I so appreciate them sharing their talent with us to see.

We have been close to tornadoes but never in a devastating situation like you see on the news.
I remember a few years back, Tornadoes ripping within a mile of us, tearing through a nearby neighborhood as well as shopping area. Damage everywhere.  That day I was doing laundry. I had the windows opened and remember a strange hot breeze coming through (in March). I returned into the laundry room, where I heard a faint train sound... reappearing into the kitchen to see that our trampoline was gone. The weights were still in our yard, but the trampoline was completely gone, as well as the top of three of my neighbors pine trees.  We later found the trampoline two doors over, mangled into twisted metal. We were so lucky.
I also remember as a child, a friend being caught in the middle of one.  She was hiding in the hall closet... the hinges of the door ripped across her (scarring her), but not as badly as the sight she saw of their rabbit pins flying as well as her dog...

Living in the Midwest, we do get a variety of weather changes. We get 4 seasons, in which I very much appreciate..

Today in Indy we had a high of 37 and a low of 27.  Annie and I saw snow earlier on the north side.  Last week, I didn't even need a jacket! My tulips and daffodils started raising their little green stems and I am hoping this cold front doesn't destroy them.

I am so ready for Spring!

Only in the Midwest!

she is grown up

My first born daughter has turned 23 today.

Time has flown. 
Wasn't she just entering college, nervous yet giddy with excitement yesterday?
Wasn't she a cheerleader full of high school drama needing my advice yesterday?
Wasn't she full of enthusiasm as she was entering Middle School, which was such a big deal because this was NOT a Catholic school which meant no more uniforms?
Wasn't she that Smiley girl that everyone loved (and she loved each and everyone back) in Catholic Elementary school? Where she and Michelle had silly adventures underneath blanketed forts, and made their edible "creations" and performed at the talent shows, just yesterday?
Wasn't she that precious Pre-schooler that refused to give up her binkie...until she trader it for her Little Minnie Mouse training wheeled bike.. yesterday?
...and wasn't it just yesterday when I gave birth to this precious perfect daughter, that showed me I had so much love to give and to receive?

Today, she lives in a nice condo with two friends (from high school).  She is finished with her classes at Ball State. She is about to start her Student Teaching in a busy 1st grade class.  She will graduate following this assignment and hopefully be hired in a school she will love. She has a tall handsome boyfriend that makes her smile.

I could not be more proud of the young woman she has become.  She is strong, smart, beautiful, kind, creative and loving.

Happy Birthday Emily♥
I love you to the moon and back.

I love her.  She is pretty darn awesome.

Christmas Cards

Today is December 3rd. We have received 4 Christmas cards.
FOUR...
I remember not so long ago, December 1st was the date many of my friends as well as myself, sent out our cards.  So, in many past years, by the third, I would have received at least a dozen.  I run a bit behind myself. For most years past, we took a picture of the girls on Thanksgiving that would be made into our cards. It became our sweet little tradition that we enjoyed as much as my family & friends that appreciated seeing the girls grow up.

Some of my favorites...

...and last years...

my Goodness, they have grown up!

But, this year... was the one I have been dreading, as far as "the picture time".

E~ "Mom... we don't want to do a picture this year."

my head~ whatttttttttttttt?

me~ ohh, well, uhm okay, but why?

E~ "It's just, well, we grew up, it's weird now."

my head~ noooooooooooooo! It's not about you guys...its's about the family & friends that love you & never see you. It's bout Dad & I being so proud about you, and want to show you off!!!

me~ "ohh, okay, are you sure?  You know these pictures mean so much to alot of folks".

E~ laughing..." no, Mom, it's you that they mean alot to. How about you let me take a picture of the Dogs to send. Everyone loves seeing the Dogs just as much."

my head~ YES! It means alot to me! Do it for ME!!!

Me~ "Okay Sweetie. I guess so"

Here is this years winning picture cards.

She did a great job with Riley's picture.  Riley looks just as excited about the picture taking as the girls.

I am sad that so many people stopped doing cards.  I too have made cuts.  I now send about a forth of what I use to send, but I still send a lot.
Especially to those I love but just haven't had the opportunity to see or even contact.  I love my family and friends.
I love getting the cards. Especially the ones with the pictures and the silly letters.  I LIKE that too much info that some complain about.
I must be signing off now.  I need to address my cards (yes I do that by hand too).

Feel free to send me your Christmas cards! I will appreciate them♥

twenty-one...

My Baby turned twenty~one.

21

Annie in her "Handmade Duct-Tape" Dress

The big "I can legally have a glass of wine, beer, or mixed drink", whoot whoot!
21
Her Birthday falls on Halloween Weekend. So, on the Eve of her Birthday, dressed in her Duct-Tape Dress ( I think she was a birthday gift  or a candle she made a flame hair piece), she had a little get-to-gether at her apartment with roommates & friends. Then at the stroke of mid-night they ventured into the bars of Muncie. Her first impression of Bars could not have been grand in a college town! But, it was her first.  Determined not to spoil it, she refused going to the bars till she was "legal". Now, this is not to say she is perfect and I am sure this was not her first drink... but, I do appreciate that she never used a fake ID and that she was a smart girl.
The next day, Friday October 29th (her actual birthday), she came home to Indianapolis, enjoyed dinner with Hubby, her Sister and me at Charlestons, and ventured on with her Sister taking her out to the Indy Broad Ripple Village night scene.  With the Halloween season in full spirits, the town was a hoping.  Sergio & I volunteered to be the DD's (designated drivers).

Emily, Annie, Haley & Brittany

Birthday Annie in costume w Hubby & I

First stop was a friends parents Halloween Party... Where Annie got initiated into their bar. Here she is with her Dad, singing & dancing to "My Humps" on a little platform. I love this picture. They are both CRACKING UP!

Annie & her Dad

She had a wonderful evening with her Sis and friends. She did not overdo it, she behaved, she had a harmless fun time.


I could not be more proud of the young woman she has become.  She is focused, she is motivated, she is amazing.
Happy Birthday Pooh!

cat donuts

posted on my daughters Facebook wall... I want these!

Perfect Fall Weekend

Yesterday was the first official day of Autumn.
Because I do not work on Fridays, I enjoyed an additional beautiful crisp day for my weekend.
I ran to Half Price Books to look for a couple of easy sewing books for the girls at school. I did find  some good ones, then I wandered over to the Children's Books. I have ALWAYS loved Children's books.  Even before having children I had a collection on a shelf. I have always been a reader & I thank my Mom for taking us to the Library every couple of weeks.  During the summers of Junior High we had the Book Mobile park across the cul de sac. I was thinking about picking up Early Readers & Story Books for my Daughter, Emily.  She will soon be teaching and wants to build her library supply.  So hard not to buy dozens!  These books are awesome! Always in beautiful condition.  I picked 9.

She's excited.
I will give them to her today after Church.

Yesterday Hubby & I went back to Ball State for more tailgating.

It was great fun. I love our friends, the Boyd's, and we had fun catching up. Hanging with the "Baby", Annie, is always a treat. She showed us the house she signed  her 2012-2013 lease with. Amazing she is just starting year 3 at BSU, and already finalizing plans for year 4 living. But if you want a good place, that is what you do. She and two current roommates will join four more for a house of SEVEN Roommates!

When I got home I snapped a couple of photos of a sneak peek of our lovely foliage. It's already starting and soon will be full bloom.

look at Dakota in the background

I love the pop of color

random leaves & branches daring their color

evergreens filling with pine cones

I must make sure I make a trip to Brown County this year for the full effect.  It is quite spectacular and I must share it with you this year.

Today is rainy.  I still love it. One of the best things about living in the Midwest is the change of seasons.  We really get it all and I feel blessed.

Sing Your Praise To The Lord

 

{not the best copy..but it will do}

In the winter of 1988, I was very pregnant with our first daughter, Emily.  Just like my 3 Musketeers Candy Bars & my 3 Taco Bell Tacos every day, I also had an incredible craving for this song, by Amy Grant. I would play it in my car cassette player very loud, over and over on my way to work. Every day to and from work.  It's as if Emily would "want" it played.  I swear, it felt like she moved to the beat. It has a very powerful musical intro. It's strong and moving.  I am surprised she wasn't born humming this tune.

This evening I heard it on Pandora Internet radio.  To be honest, even though I am still a huge Amy Grant fan, I haven't heard this particular song in a long time.  I tend to play her newer CDs rather than this old favorite. To be honest, I don't believe I have it any more.
It was a very deja vu experience hearing it played. Ironic as well, as Ms Emily has been heavy on my mind, since we moved her out this past weekend to the condo.  Listening to the words of a song I sang so many time before were heard in a new perspective this evening.
This song completely fits her. She wears her faith proudly and has strong convictions.

May you always sing your praises to the Lord Emily.  I am so very proud of you♥

This & That, Here & There

It has been a busy week.
I spent Monday, Thursday & Friday moving the oldest Baby Girl from Muncie, Indiana back to Indianapolis, Indiana. She has left her college town, and is to begin enjoying living in a condo with a Bestie. She still has one class in Muncie. A Teaching Math class.  She will commute twice a week to "Teach" Math to elementary children.  She doesn't know what grade yet, but is excited for this adventure. She also has landed her old Nanny position for the other three days a week here in Indy. At least until January, when she will begin her Student Teaching with 1st graders for a semester.  Emily's condo is BEAUTIFUL! Her sweet Roomie has done such a grand job decorating it. Emily is replacing a roomate that is getting married, perfect timing, (although Hubby would rather her stay home & save the money... I think it is a perfect arrangement for now.  Brittany has always been one of my favorites of Emily's friends. They have been friends since 6th grade! I love her Mom as well.

I snuck a couple of pictures...Emily, like her Dad, hates me snapping pictures, but I wanted you to see how darling this condo is. Isn't it snazzy with the browns & reds? Brit did this and a grand job. She said she is debating on changing it now. Getting tired of the brown. Emily will be ready to help if she does want to change it.
She took Izzy with her.  Izzy's new "litter mate is Ava.  Brittany's kitty. We miss them both. Izzy...well she has lived her this past year since Emily couldn't have her in her last house.  It's a love/hate relationship (I love her/ she hates me).  Our other ark pets wonder where she went... Emily & Izzy joined us for dinner last night which was great for all the pets to see she is fine.
Hubby is out on business this week. Teaching classes on Grievances. It's an interesting turn of his usual work actually handling grievances and negotiating.  I think he makes a good instructor.
I am hoping to get much accomplished this week, unlike my do nothing week a while back.  Busy Busy Busy is what I must be this week!
Projects to work on (Annie & I have some great ones we are hoping to finish this week!), friends to meet up with, Hospice family to visit, practice of my sign language, and the usual housework to boot.  I MUST get some letters written.  Catch up on a new book, and gets some Bible reading in too.
With that in mind & seeing that I have already spent too long in Blog World, I must bid you goodbye for now.  Have a Lovely Sunday. Blessings to you all♥