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Showing posts with label paths. Show all posts
Showing posts with label paths. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

No Regrets.... from now on

I admit. I have had a few.
Maybe too many.
But...
Would I have arrived where I am without them?

I do wish I could twitch my nose, and POOF! that didn't happen!

But... I can't.

And that's okay.

I have learned a lot over the past few years. Particularly the past couple.

What has happened, has happened. 

As Betsy has taught me... "you can't changed that chair into a couch no matter how much you want it done!" With that being said, I am ready to move on.

From writing, and reviling some scars I have thought much about some of the things I have endured. I am not looking for pity here... I just wonder how things were overlooked and I was not rescued.
...from the abusive teacher
...from the abusive uncle
...from the abusive friend of a parent
...from the abusive boyfriend
...from the neglectful friend

was it really hard to step up and protect the child? the teen? the woman?

sigh

Then, I think of the mistakes I have made on my own. Sure, blame it on someone or something, but when you get down to it, I made my paths myself.
What was I thinking?
Why wasn't I thinking?

sigh times two.

Today is a new day. 
From here on, I am not going to allow myself to be a victim. 
I am going to continue to be me... moving forward with a generous heart full of love. I am going to be giving and helpful. I am gonna keep smiling and laughing.

I feel a sense of relief.  Like a heavy burden has been lifted.

dare i say it?

I CAN BREATHE