(I wish I was referring to a real saddle on a horse. That would definitely cheer me!)
Thank you to all of you that commented prayed and sent positive energy. I indeed felt it. Sometimes my depression gives me a little butt kicking and, well, I felt a whopper last week. I do have wonderful coping methods to utilize and usually they work, just some days are tougher.
I come from your typical dysfunctional family with scary skeletons in the closets. A long history of depression on both sides as well as suicidal tendencies (more unsuccessful than successful). This family background also packs a lot of love and stories of happily ever afters as well as survival skills.
Anyway, I feel back on track after a loving weekend and some spiritual growth. A Wedding, a Sister get together, a Daughter for dinner, some great Spouse time, chatting with a Bestie, enjoyment of beautiful weather, some work on the Baby Clothes Project, and some deep talking with God, made for a wonderful weekend.
I may not be perfect. I may never feel the self confidence and worth I should. But I am a fighter. I do know that God, my family and friends all love me very much. Once I start learning to accept, respect and love myself, then I can truly be happy.
A work in progress...
I have some challenges to get through this week. But with my head up, eyes wide open, I will face them, and do my best. This too will pass and I will have new challenges to come. How I deal with today's will help me prepare for tomorrow's.
I am adding a couple of coping skills to my daily routine. I started an Daily Audio Bible app on my phone. Determined to get through the entire Bible within a year. It's been a while, referring to my favorite scriptures is great but time to rediscover some others. I am also determined to get healthier. Eating habits as well as excercise. Is it too late at 48 to start running? I have NEVER been a runner, but I have been thinking about it.. Perfect neighborhood for it. If not, then my bicycle is getting the dust off and I'm replacing the rotted tires. Or maybe for the upcoming Mothers Day / birthday I can get one of these groovy vintage style bikes. Either way, I have 14 months before I turn 50 and I WILL get in shape by then, by Golly!
Well, neglected home is begging me to clean. Time to throw some tunes on. Maybe I will go to Brookie's Cookie Jar I love her playlist, go check it out!
Love to you All♥