As I sat in the dentist chair, I shivered. Tightly gripping my cell phone in one hand, and Annie's ipod in the other. I completely trust my Dentist and her staff. However, I have had a few mishaps in the dentist chair before and the thought of them sawing and drilling the broken crown out of my mouth put a fear into me. Apparently I had a faulty crown with a hairline crack. It happens. No charge to me, other than the anxiety attack , discomfort and time spend replacing it.
For the next two and a half hours, I cranked up the music, shut my eyes and opened my mouth. Xanax was my friend as it took the edge off. Uncomfortable, scared, but no pain. I have a temporary and get the real McCoy June 18th.Than is one form of my fears.
I also have fears that I can not control such as finances, job security and economy.
I have the parental fear that my daughters will not need me anymore, or worse, they WILL need me in ways never imagined.
I have fears that involve medical situations.
I have the fear of the unknown. The things to come or not to come.
How will I get through? What is to come? Will I survive as usual? Or will I crash?
Life doesn't come with a manual or instructions.
I dig in, do my best, pray, hope and dream.
I have my posse. Family, Besties, even ordinary people that have a genuine care for me.
With so much on my plate for the next few weeks, I am going to have to hold back another anxiety attack that is biting my ankles. I just don't have the time or patience. So, pray for me, think of me and watch my back...please.