Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Capivating Fear

As I sat in the dentist chair, I shivered. Tightly gripping my cell phone in one hand, and Annie's ipod in the other. I completely trust my Dentist and her staff. However, I have had a few mishaps in the dentist chair before and the thought of them sawing and drilling the broken crown out of my mouth put a fear into me. Apparently I had a faulty crown with a hairline crack. It happens. No charge to me, other than the anxiety attack , discomfort and time spend replacing it.

For the next two and a half hours, I cranked up the music, shut my eyes and opened my mouth. Xanax was my friend as it took the edge off. Uncomfortable, scared, but no pain. I have a temporary and get the real McCoy June 18th.
Than is one form of my fears.

I also have fears that I can not control such as finances, job security and economy.

I have the parental fear that my daughters will not need me anymore, or worse, they WILL need me in ways never imagined.

I have fears that involve medical situations.

I have the fear of the unknown. The things to come or not to come.

How will I get through? What is to come? Will I survive as usual? Or will I crash?

Life doesn't come with a manual or instructions.

I dig in, do my best, pray, hope and dream.

I have my posse. Family, Besties, even ordinary people that have a genuine care for me.

With so much on my plate for the next few weeks, I am going to have to hold back another anxiety attack that is biting my ankles. I just don't have the time or patience. So, pray for me, think of me and watch my back...please.


Natalie said...

Got ya back, honey. Take care,I really relate to the crown situation.xx

Linda said...

Praying for you in the coming weeks ahead.

I don't have too many fears, but I am deathly claustrophobic which I always knew, but it was really brought to life after last summer's MRI. NEVER, ever AGAIN. They would have to completely knock me out (which I'm also afraid of). Due to that experience, I was initially apprehensive at my last 6-month Dental checkup, because I can't stand people hanging over me. But I did okay. Hope you will too with whatever fears come your way.

Love, Linda

lakeviewer said...

Ouch! Hate dental work! Get yourself a silly magazine and chill out. Che sera, sera. You can't predict or worry about everything, or you'll die of stress. Live for the moment.

An English Shepherd said...

The boss hates the Dentist as well...

Wizz :-)