I have started the New Year full of happy thoughts, ambitions, and strength. However, my brain has decided to not participate today.
I am anxious, jumpy and extremely tearful. I don't understand how one day I am feeling so good, then crash the next.
I had trouble sleeping, then came the nightmares. I woke up wanting to just pull the sheets over my head and stay there all day. I know that doesn't help. I understand that I can't let it pull me in.
I have both girls around today. The last thing I want is for them to worry about Mom. Sergio has been wonderful and I truly do not know what I would do without him.
I am going to crank up my Pandora Internet Radio. Find some cool stuff like Coles Whalen, Chris Botti, Norah Jones,Cat Stevens and Diana Krall. Heck maybe I will even get some Areosmith and Lynryd Skynrd to cheer me up. Better yet I will pull a little of all my favorites together and get into a cleaning binge.
Then if I can get it all done before dark fall, I owe Riley a walk.
Wish me luck. It is another Xanax kind of day!
another day pretty much like the previous days
50 minutes ago